I get a call from one of my closest friends (who is my sister as far as I’m concerned) telling me that it’s about that time to have a talk with her daughter (My God Daughter) about boys. That’s not exactly the phone call I wanted to wake up to but, Hey, I signed up for the job in a situation where Daddy is… let’s just say, “removed” from the situation so I guess I have to throw on my rubber gloves and pull out my Boys 101 pamphlet and report for duty, lol!!!
I love the fact that being a God Parent allows me to have somewhat of “on the job” training. I’m sure it’s just a microcosm of what being a full out parent is like but, it still gives me some insight. I just don’t feel too comfortable about this particular topic because I know how I was at 12 years old and it’s going to be a bit challenging to warn her about and create a defense within her against little man whores like I was. She’s a beautiful girl, very smart, and mature and I know she’ll take to it well but with all the knowledge I have, along with how VIVIDLY I can remember those days, I want to give her advice without sharing things that she probably shouldn’t hear, lol… And there in lies the difficulty. Then again… I could’ve received a, “Your God Daughter likes girls” phone call and that would have been even more interesting to talk about.
What I really want to say to her is:
“Boys from ages 10-25 carry awful and horrible diseases…”
“Remember that road trip when we took a wrong turn thru West Virginia? Remember how everyone’s teeth looked? Well, your teeth AND your coochie snacks could end up looking like that if a boy touches it…”
*No offense to any of my Mountaineer Supporters : /
“I’ll kill him or hurt him bad…
“1-Being the first to lose their virginity, 2-Sneakers, 3-Food, 4-Masturbation, 5-Video Games, 6-Masturbation, and 7-TV is the priority list of a 12 year old boy…”
“Junior HS and HS Boys often eat dinner while on the toilet…”
“If you kiss a boy, A watermelon grows in your stomach…”
“When you have a baby before the age of 20, the baby has a higher risk of being born with 3 arms…”
“I had my first girlfriend at 18 and all we did was homework together…”
“You don’t need a boyfriend. You have me…”
What I’m actually going to say to her is:
It’s fine to talk with boys, and it’s ok to have a boyfriend as long as you both explain to me, IN PERSON, what being boyfriend/girlfriend means and I approve of your definition.
If a boy tells you he loves you, It’s the same as when Mommy used to tell you there was a tooth fairy. It sounded good but that’s not really the case, even if he means well.
Every guy under the age of 27 (Often times older than that) has a “Yup, I Hit That” list. That’s not a list you want to be on. Trust me.
The value of something is always based on how rare it is. The more rare it is, the more valuable it becomes. You want to be valuable and rare. Starting today, some of your female friends will be doing sexual things, if they haven’t already started. And they will keep doing them, more and more. As this goes on, you want to be the one who is rare and increasing in value as they decrease in value in the eyes of respectable people.
If you bring a baby around here, You’re moving out and you’re on your own… And TRUST ME, they boy who did it to/with you is not gonna help out either.
RUN!! If he ever says: ”I can’t feel anything like that… How about just the tip?… You’re not gonna get pregnant, trust me…I shower everyday, I ain’t got no STD’s…”
Pray for me y’all…
Also, If you’ll be in the NYC area in Mid January and would like to attend the soon coming FREE shoot/show, (Read my last post entitled What is #FPBK for details) please send a quick e-mail to 3HirdPowerEvents@gmail.com with “#FPBK Show/Shoot” as the title and info will be sent to you soon. In supporting this movement, you are indeed supporting me but more importantly, you’re supporting yourself…
And why do Flo and I still look exactly the same? WTD??
-Kel SpencerSubscribe for FREE over there, under “Keep In Touch…“ Follow Me on Twitter @KelSpencer Join Me on Facebook, Youtube & Centric TV God’s Favorite Emcee, Warrior Poet, Pen.Man, Satan Hater, Ice cream Lover, Quarterback of The Urban Experience & chicks dig me too…