Posts Tagged ‘Fathers’

#SPENCERISM- The Man Box

Posted: December 20, 2010 in Just Sharing...
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I agree with the image above. I’m too sexy for boxes too!

I thank God that I was Blessed to be raised with 2 parents in my household. And we have songs called “Mama” and “Dear Mama” and “I’ll always Love my Mama” etc… so it’s obvious that ALL mothers are wonderful and so is mine. But I am honored by the fact that My father was and is a Real Man. A man who rarely gives me a handshake or a fist bump but hugs and kisses me on the cheek to this very day. A man who cried in front of me when I played him a song that I dedicated to him. The same man who I have seen (armed) physically defend our Brooklyn home growing up. A man who I have seen respected by the most gangsta of gangsters from the 70′s but also loved by the most gentle of people. He is a Balanced man. Our idea of what a Man is and should be is horribly screwed up. I was on BBM with one of my homegirls for about an hour this morning, trying to get her to understand that men and women even view marriage and parenthood differently (largely) because of the substandard model of manhood that saturates society. Because of that, I want you ALL to understand that my father is who I am thankful for when I watch clips like this… And NO the guy in the clip isn’t my father, lol:

TONY PORTER “A CALL TO MEN” December 2010

If you have never shared my postings with anyone in the past, I urge you to share this one. If you can send chain letters about God, and forward jokes and silly videos, I’m sure you can send this as well. I’ve been promoting #TeamNoBoxes for a reason. This Fresh Prince of Brooklyn (#FPBK) Project is VERY REAL to me and is something that we all can relate to.

Check out A- My latest feature in XI Magazine… and B- my post entitled What is #FPBK. If you’ll be in the NYC area in Mid January and would like to attend the soon coming FREE shoot/show, (Read What is #FPBK for details) please send a quick e-mail to 3HirdPowerEvents@gmail.com with “#FPBK Show/Shoot” as the title and info will be sent to you soon. In supporting this movement, you are indeed supporting me but more importantly, you’re supporting yourself…

But please, gimme your thoughts!!!!

-Kel Spencer

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God’s Favorite Emcee, Warrior Poet, Pen.Man, Satan Hater, Ice cream Lover, Quarterback of The Urban Experience & chicks dig me too…

#SPENCERISM- My FIRST Father to Daughter chat…

Posted: November 11, 2010 in Just Sharing...
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No, I don’t have children so calm down… But I do have 8 God Children, 6 God Daughters, and about 4 friends who are expecting children and dropping “God Father” hints already, smh…

I get a call from one of my closest friends (who is my sister as far as I’m concerned) telling me that it’s about that time to have a talk with her daughter (My God Daughter) about boys. That’s not exactly the phone call I wanted to wake up to but, Hey, I signed up for the job in a situation where Daddy is… let’s just say, “removed” from the situation so I guess I have to throw on my rubber gloves and pull out my Boys 101 pamphlet and report for duty, lol!!!

I love the fact that being a God Parent allows me to have somewhat of “on the job” training. I’m sure it’s just a microcosm of what being a full out parent is like but, it still gives me some insight. I just don’t feel too comfortable about this particular topic because I know how I was at 12 years old and it’s going to be a bit challenging to warn her about and create a defense within her against little man whores like I was. She’s a beautiful girl, very smart, and mature and I know she’ll take to it well but with all the knowledge I have, along with how VIVIDLY I can remember those days, I want to give her advice without sharing things that she probably shouldn’t hear, lol… And there in lies the difficulty. Then again… I could’ve received a, “Your God Daughter likes girls” phone call and that  would have been even more interesting to talk about.

What I really want to say to her is:

“Boys from ages 10-25 carry awful and horrible diseases…”

“Remember that road trip when we took a wrong turn thru West Virginia? Remember how everyone’s teeth looked? Well, your teeth AND your coochie snacks could end up looking like that if a boy touches it…”

*No offense to any of my Mountaineer Supporters : /

“I’ll kill him or hurt him bad…

“1-Being the first to lose their virginity, 2-Sneakers, 3-Food, 4-Masturbation, 5-Video Games, 6-Masturbation, and 7-TV is the priority list of a 12 year old boy…”

“Junior HS and HS Boys often eat dinner while on the toilet…”

“If you kiss a boy, A watermelon grows in your stomach…”

“When you have a baby before the age of 20, the baby has a higher risk of being born with 3 arms…”

“I had my first girlfriend at 18 and all we did was homework together…”

“You don’t need a boyfriend. You have me…”


What I’m actually going to say to her is:

It’s fine to talk with boys, and it’s ok to have a boyfriend as long as you both explain to me, IN PERSON, what being boyfriend/girlfriend means and I approve of your definition.

If a boy tells you he loves you, It’s the same as when Mommy used to tell you there was a tooth fairy. It sounded good but that’s not really the case, even if he means well.

Every guy under the age of 27 (Often times older than that) has a “Yup, I Hit That” list. That’s not a list you want to be on. Trust me.

The value of something is always based on how rare it is. The more rare it is, the more valuable it becomes. You want to be valuable and rare. Starting today, some of your female friends will be doing sexual things, if they haven’t already started. And they will keep doing them, more and more. As this goes on, you want to be the one who is rare and increasing in value as they decrease in value in the eyes of respectable people.

If you bring a baby around here, You’re moving out and you’re on your own… And TRUST ME, they boy who did it to/with you is not gonna help out either.

RUN!! If he ever says: ”I can’t feel anything like that… How about just the tip?… You’re not gonna get pregnant, trust me…I shower everyday, I ain’t got no STD’s…”

Pray for me y’all…

Also, If you’ll be in the NYC area in Mid January and would like to attend the soon coming FREE shoot/show, (Read my last post entitled What is #FPBK for details) please send a quick e-mail to 3HirdPowerEvents@gmail.com with “#FPBK Show/Shoot” as the title and info will be sent to you soon. In supporting this movement, you are indeed supporting me but more importantly, you’re supporting yourself…

#MeAndMyBrother w/lil Camryn circa Fall 2000

Time flies…

And why do Flo and I still look exactly the same? WTD??

-Kel Spencer

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God’s Favorite Emcee, Warrior Poet, Pen.Man, Satan Hater, Ice cream Lover, Quarterback of The Urban Experience & chicks dig me too…

#SPENCERISM- You Black Women, Smh…

Posted: August 5, 2010 in Just Sharing...
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This is the reason that I ONLY mess with white women, Smh…

LoL!! I joke, I joke… I love all women all colors, we’re all God’s children so calm down. But seriously, I want to talk about Black Women and some of the difficulties with them. Let’s break it down so it can forever stay broke…

I think it’s safe to say that the ideal situation in a household is for a child to have both parents. There are certain things that a child needs from each parent and from the union of the parents. Unfortunately, with the lack of “fathers” in the black community, this affects our children. Furthermore, when it affects our female children who later grow into women whom I (And other men) choose to date, this inadequacies show up and show up in some not so good ways sometimes. For example…

“My father wasn’t around and I’ve never had to report to a man or let a man know where I’m

going so stop calling and texting, I’mma be where I’m at and we’ll see eachother when I’m

good and ready.”


“My father wasn’t around so it forced me to toughen up when it comes to men because at any given

moment, y’all can just bounce and be on to the next chick. So, I know you say you love me but

my ‘father’ used to say the same thing and I’ve only seen him 4 times in my life so all that love stuff

sounds good but men have a funny way of showing it.”


“Wait… you want to share with me? You want to share your feelings and dreams with me?

HA!! That’s not what men do, you must be a weak man. My father, well what I knew of him, was

in the streets and when I did see him he was beating my mother and me.

That’s a strong man so all of this weak emotional stuff you’re talking is for the birds.”

Some of these may seem a bit far fetched to you. But to some of you, you’ve either said them or experienced someone saying this or something like it. This is a real issue, people. As men, we need to start paying an extra special attention to the way we raise our daughters and the “Man-Models” that we put before the young women. Yes, this applies to the young males too but boys for the most part can bump their head and keep it moving by learning by foolish mistakes… Or can we? I don’t know. But what I do know is that a lot of the “stuff” I’ve encountered with women is rooted in not having a Daddy or from having a poor example of what a Daddy should be. I ask that any women whom this may apply (or who know women whom this applies to) really think about some of your ways, and how they may be rooted in fatherlessness. I don’t expect it to be easy, and may even hurt a little bit but it could be part of your “I can’t find a good man” problem… Maybe, just maybe. And fellas, please be more patient with your woman who may exhibit personality traits that can be rooted in fatherlessness. She may not even realize why she does what she does or says what she says but perhaps you both can read this together as a good ice breaker into digging deep and making some positive changes. Also, if you or someone you know has a daughter (or son) on the way, I’d urge you to really pray and focus on what the true definition of a parent is so that a lot of our foolishness isn’t passed down to the next generation and tearing apart their relationships. After all, look at marriages 100 years ago versus marriages now. See what I mean? Or maybe it’s just me…

-Kel Spencer

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God’s Favorite Emcee, Warrior Poet, Pen.Man, Satan Hater, Ice cream Lover, Quarterback of The Urban Experience & chicks dig me too…